Wednesday

How to Deal with Someone or a Group You Don't Like

But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! Matthew 5:44

We have all met people we simply don't like, yet we have to deal with them anyway because of our associations. You may have to see this person on the job, at a family reunion, or when you leave your home every morning. This person is like a thorn in your side. So how does one handle the negative feelings inside every time he or she sees this person or group?

Use Your Faith

If you are one who prays, pray for them. Now we are not talking about the kind of prayers that say, "Dear Lord, move this person out of my neighborhood..." or "I wish this person would disappear off the face of the earth." Those prayers don't do anything but fuel negative feelings. Sometimes these people are put in our path to test our character. If you grew up in an environment where family and friends didn't like a certain race of people, chances are you are being tested every time you encounter that one African American, Caucasian, Mexican, Asian, Italian, or some other race of people on your street, at your workplace, or in your church. Could it be you just don't like those people because of someone's deep hatred that was instilled in you? As much as we would like to say, "I'm not a racist!" God could be showing us different. So pray for peace of mind, a change of heart, and an opportunity to get to know these people before judging them.

Take Advantage of Opportunities

There will be those times when you aren't in a rush to get anywhere and then here comes that person or group you don't like wanting to talk. Rather than, resent their invites or their requests to talk, take a moment to listen. When you hear something you don't agree with, tell them politely. If you find that this person or group is disturbing and they proved why you don't want to be bothered with these people, continue to act distant. No one will blame you for not wanting an additional headache added to your life. The truth is not everyone is a friend and not everyone has our best interest in mind, but at least give the person or group a chance before you judge them.

Sometimes people do end up being great people to hang around when we just give them that one opportunity to prove themselves. We discover unexpected blessings, business partners, life time mates, and more because we gave someone or a group a chance. So be open!

Research

When you know the person's name, the company they represent or organization, then do your research. Sometimes you may not be doing any future business with the person you don't like, but you may find the group they represent phenomenal. There are ways to get around people we don't like to get to the people we do. So find out who the leadership in the area might be or if there are other representatives you can do business.

Appoint an Assistant

Let's say the person you don't like wants to do business with you. Well these days, you don't have to sit down with people. You can set the place and pace of the relationship early on by stating the best way to contact you or even better appoint an assistant who will be handling your phone calls or emails. You can say, "I have an assistant who will be giving you a call back on what we just talked about."

Create Distance

It's usually easier to handle strangers we don't like then family. With strangers, we can just walk by them and don't speak when we know they are nothing but trouble. In addition, we can avoid certain streets, shop at different locations, or move away from those strangers we don't like. However, toxic family members can be challenging even after we have done all the things previously mentioned. One way we can handle family we don't like is by creating distance. Maybe you can't move away from them, but you can stop calling or receiving their messages and tell relatives and mutual friends to stop passing this person's messages to you unless of course there is an emergency.

When you find yourself in a predicament where you don't like a person or group, consider what it is that makes you dislike him or her and/or association. It may not be the person, but their actions or the group they belong to that upsets you. Try to focus on the positive attributes that this person does have and hopefully this will at least help you during the time that you have to be around him or her.

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